forgiveness

Anger and bitterness can consume your heart. It's a toxic sludge that prohibits you from being free and able to love. In the passed couple months, I have struggled with forgiveness. When someone hurts me, I am upset. I mope around for a few days and then I am angry. How could they do that to me? What did I do to deserve that? I seriously want nothing to do with them.

Notice a trend? It's all about me, me, me. Not once do I direct my focus to God. If I focus on myself, I am focusing on hurt and negativity. I am choosing to hold onto the anger and the bitterness. If I shift the focus to God, I am focusing on love.

Forgiveness is an expression of love. It is not an emotion, it's an act of will. We can forgive others because Christ forgave us. Forgiveness is an outpouring of love and mercy. Does it mean that the offense did not hurt? Does it mean that whatever that person did to you was okay? No. Forgiveness means letting go. "What you did hurt, but I will not hold it against you."

When I hold onto anger, I receive bitterness. I receive stress. Holding onto anger blinds me with rage and hatred. When I let go and give away forgiveness, I receive love. I receive peace. Love prospers when a fault is forgiven. This Easter, look up to the Man that loved you so much He died on a cross for you. He died on a cross for us while we were still sinners, undeserving of His grace and forgiveness. This Easter, do not treat others as they treat you. Treat others in the way that God treats you. Let go and forgive. Let God work in your heart this Easter and always. Let God guide you:

Show me how to love the unlovable

Show me how to reach the unreachable

Help me now to do the impossible

Forgiveness

(Forgiveness - Matthew West)

Don't let your hearts be consumed by the evil that causes Satan to rejoice. Don't let what has been done to you make you forget what Jesus did for you. This Easter, I pray that you may find it in your heart to forgive whoever has hurt you. I pray that you are reminded of the things God has forgiven you for. May your hearts be filled with God's love and mercy.

we love because He first loved us

 

Cheers to you, friends! You are engaged and my heart could not be any happier for you. I pray that your marriage is everything that God has designed it to be. In a world where materialistic things consume us, it is easy to get caught up in the wedding planning and beautiful slightly hectic chaos. My prayer for you is that you do not forget what this engagement and marriage is truly all about.

In the midst of this beautiful love, do not forget to glorify God in your lives and in your relationship. You cannot know love without first knowing God. I pray that you put Him first in all your planning and for eternity as you two start your lives together as one.

Don’t let the world warp your idea of a wedding. Don’t get me wrong. I’m super excited for the decorations, the dancing, (perhaps some wine?), the tear-worthy presence of love and happiness. The world’s definition of a wedding is all about presentation. The prettiest and shiniest ring, the most gorgeous dress, the perfect colors, all the beautiful flowers, the perfect venue, and so on. We often get so caught up in the dream of a wedding and the way that the movies portray love that we forget the Director that has the BEST script for our love journey: God.

God has so many plans for you and your future spouse. Marriage is sacred. Marriage is to be held in love and honor.  It is a beautiful commitment between two who become one flesh. In Ephesians (Ephesians 5:25-33), the Bible states that husbands should love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Husbands should love their wives as their own bodies, nourishing and cherishing it, just as Christ does for the church. A woman is not independent of man (don’t worry ladies, men aren’t independent of women either) and as a wife, submit to your husband and be a holy woman hoping in God.

You two are beginning a journey together. 

Don’t let the world corrupt your idea of love. It isn’t about forever butterflies or the magical music playing in the background as you two frolic in a meadow filled with dandelions. Love is patient. Love is kind. Love means slowly losing your mind (Just kidding. Couldn’t resist throwing my 27 Dresses quote in there). Who knows, you may lose your mind slightly. Let’s face it, that toilet seat is going to be left up a couple times and the comfy large t-shirts may or may not disappear from his closet and become pajamas.

However, God has created a love that is absolutely beautiful. Don’t worry about the arguments, the disappearance of butterflies and floating hearts in your eyes. Love is so much more than the movies portray. And God is so so ready for you to enjoy that! Please, let Him be the director and writer of your love story.

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Love never fails.

God blessed you with one another. Smile at that. Heck, dance around in the living room and jump for joy. God gave you one another. Don’t forget to praise Him for that. You two are so blessed and so loved. In the midst of the chaotic planning and new journeys, focus on God, focus on His love for you two.

 I pray that you two are blessed with an amazing love. I pray that when times get tough, you are aware of His presence and learn to help each other lean on Him. I pray that you two share many years of laughter and adventures. May you both feel His peace and always keep your heart and mind open to His guidance in your marriage.

Girlies, you are going to make an absolutely beautiful bride. You are going to make an amazing wifey as well. Don’t feel stressed out with any planning. Give it all to God. Like I said, just let Him write the story. Smile at your blessing. Be thankful for all God has given you. You are such a capable, loving, and gorgeous woman of God. I am so happy that you have found a sweet man that you are ready to spend your life with as husband and wife. You deserve this joy. I cannot wait to watch you say “I Do” and be around to witness the journey God has created for you and your future husband.

Men, you hurt her and I’ll kill you. (Kidding.) But seriously, you are a wonderful gentleman. You will make a fine husband. Remember to put God first in this journey. Smile at your beautiful blessing as well. You are an intelligent, strong, and handsome man of God. I am so happy that you have found your gal that you get to call your wife. You two make a beautiful and strong couple. I can’t wait to watch your relationship bloom!

So cheers to you two! Cheers to a lifetime of adventures you will share together! Be excited. Be joyful. Laugh. Dance. May God bless you two and may your marriage be more beautiful than your wedding.

grateful

My mind used to be a world of negativity and ungratefulness. I complained when something I could not control did not go the way I wanted it to go. I laid in my bed defeated when nothing seemed to be going right. I was pissed off for the rest of the day if I made a bad grade on a test or if something or someone let me down. Of course, I still struggle with these moments at times. We're all human, right?  

Your perspective starts to change when you focus on things you are grateful for. There are plenty of times I have heard this statement. There are also plenty of grumbling replies I have heard following this statement, but the most popular? "There is nothing to be grateful for. Absolutely nothing is going right and this world sucks anyway." 

What do you gain when you focus on so much negativity? Can you name one positive thing? I didn't think so. Shift your mind from negativity and grumbling to positivity and gratefulness. 

God has blessed you with life. It's time to start each day with a grateful attitude. Positive thoughts and thankfulness lead to so many good and loving things that let God's light radiate over you. That toxic negativity and complaining shifts your focus to Satan, someone that will fill your beautiful head with defeat and bitterness. Darkness cannot drive out darkness. Find God's light in gratefulness. 

This week, gratefulness has been placed in my heart. I am so grateful for my family and my friends. I am grateful for the University of South Alabama and for the internship I have been placed in. I am very thankful for Hobby Lobby and this super soft blanket I'm cuddling in as I type out my thoughts to share with you all. I'm thankful for church and for pizza rolls. I'm thankful for the blue sky today and for sunscreen and for coffee. I'm beyond grateful to belong to a God that unconditionally loves me. 

You see, it is not joy that causes us to be grateful. It is gratitude that makes us joyful. There is always something to be grateful for, my friend. So take a deep breath. Exhale all of your worries. Hand them over to God. Now, take another deep breath and focus on the things you are grateful for. Focus on those things you may have taken for granted and thank God for the many blessings that have been placed in your life. 

 

set the world on fire

"Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves." Proverbs 31:8

As a social work major, I have heard it all:

"That job does not make a lot of money."

"So all you do is take kids away from homes, right?"

"You have to be called to a job like that."

"So you just have to want to help people, right? People always come to you for advice!"

 Social workers do not choose this career with money in mind. In fact, if you're choosing social work just for the money, you are in the totally wrong profession in the first place. Money is a temporary and worldly thing. God tells us not to worry about those things. The Bible tells us that we are more valuable than birds (Yes, I know it says it a little more gracefully). Whatever you choose to do, God will take care of you as long as you are using the talents you have been given and you are giving Him the glory! 

Let's go ahead and get this one straight as well. Social workers are advocators, supporters, listeners, teachers, and leaders. Values, integrity, love, honesty.....these are the things that make up social workers. Social workers fight for rights, fight for justice, fight for change. Social workers want families kept together and for children to be in a safe and nurturing environment. Social workers will push you, encourage you, and help you. You will find a social worker in a school, a hospital, a mental health or substance abuse center, and so on. Social workers are available in clinical aspects, as well as international and research aspects and many more. They are called to so much. They must be prepared to work with people from all kinds of backgrounds with all kinds of different troubles. 

Social workers are strong. They must listen to heart-wrenching stories or watch grieving families. They witness chaos, pain, hurt, anger, and disgust. Social work is not about being that friend that everyone comes to for advice (which is great, don't get me wrong). It's about having strength and an open-mind with no judgements attached. It's about being able to put your sensitive side, well, aside. It's about having the wisdom to know that you CANNOT change somebody. Can you respectfully sit in the same room of a woman or man who has sexually, physically, or emotionally abused their children? Can you walk into the filthiest home you have ever been in without cringing or making judgement? Would you be able to listen to a woman speak of her domestic violence situation while she shows you the bruises? Would you be able to deal with attitudes, cursing, awful smells? Can you watch a loved one die of a terminal illness and witness the grieving family? Can you work well under pressure and be ready for tough choices? Do you even know how to conduct evidence-based research or figure out a treatment plan for an individual? Can you list the different cultural and racial differences to be aware of when interacting with a client, whether it is in a counseling or medical setting? If you flinched or said no to any of those questions, thank a social worker.

God blessed men and women with the talents and skills to be social workers. He blessed social workers with a strong heart and mind. He gets endless glory for providing these men and women with the ability to speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves. 

I personally believe that the profession is a calling, yes. I believe God blesses those people with the characteristics and talents they need to be a social worker. And I am so very grateful to share my talents with the world as a social worker. I am so grateful to God, to my family, to my friends, to my fellow social work pals.....they are all constantly there for me, pushing me, encouraging me, loving me. (Wine has also been there for me, just throwing that out there.)

I will speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves. 

Please keep me in your prayers as I finish out these last couple months of my internship. It has been a great opportunity to learn so many things in the child welfare world. Please pray for children who are being or have been physically, emotionally, or sexually abused. Pray that they may be blessed with healing and peace. Also, please pray for foster parents, that they may be blessed with the compassion and patience they need to take care of these hurting children. 

Social work is an amazing profession. It's the chance to make a difference in the world. It's a chance to let God's light shine in others' darkness.

Lastly, I would like to give a shout out to all of you out there working hard toward your dreams and career goals! You can do it! I think it is SO cool that you are pursuing what God has placed on your heart. Get out there and show the world what He has blessed you with. If you ever feel discouraged, know that God is always there rooting you on. You are a blessed individual with an amazing purpose. Fellow dream pursuers, encourage one another! I hate the typical "Well you should try being a blah blah major" or "That's an easy major!" K, just stop. It's not a competition. Each person on this Earth has their own journey and their own purpose. Let them live it, let them pursue it. 

Now......GO AND SET THE WORLD ON FIRE with your fiery God-given passions and blazing skills!! 

 

adjust your crown

I had the great opportunity to attend the Alabama Conference of Social Work with some great people this past week. 

While I learned many things and enjoyed the time with my fellow classmates, one particular moment from the three days of workshops and speakers stood out to me.

 Miss Alabama's Outstanding Teen 2015, Kaitlynn Campbell, came to speak to us. Her story was beautiful and of course brought a few tears to the room. Here is a girl who had been a victim of abuse and had lived in different foster care and group homes. She shared her struggles, her negative attitude, her beautiful and heart-warming story. Please, if you ever get the time, google her and read her story. The basis of her speech was beautiful, because it was guided by the Holy Spirit. In a world where publicly glorifying God is frowned upon, that inspiring young lady stood up in front of over 200 people to share her story and give God the glory for every bit of success in her life. She was a refreshing breath of air to remind everyone to keep their eyes on the One above, through every circumstance. Never forget to give Him the glory. Her story alone will give you chill bumps, but I think it was the overwhelming love and presence of God that entered that room that made me (and many others) cry.

"A Daughter of the King is not known by the CROWN she wears, but the MESSAGE she bears."

 Kaitlynn may have been wearing her Miss Alabama's Outstanding Teen crown, but she had a much more admirable crown glowing brightly on her head. She is a daughter of the one true King and the crown that had been bought and paid for was shining radiantly. 

Ladies, who created you? God. YOU are a daughter of the King. While you readjust that crown on the top of your head, do the same to your attitude. You are a woman of God. If things are not going your way, if things are difficult right now, if things just seem to be falling apart, focus your eyes on the Lord. Satan will tell you that you are weak and that there is no hope. He will tell you that you're not good enough and nothing good is going to happen and that you might as well just accept it. God tells you that He is always there. God tells you that you are beautiful and loved. You are so worthy. Do you not feel that overwhelming power of love when you tell yourself that you were created by God? Jason Evert says that "Women are thousands of reminders of the beauty of Heaven." You have a radiant light. You have a pure and glowing soul. You have a gift and a purpose. You are worth more than rubies. You are more than perfect make-up and trendy clothes. YOU are thousands of reminders of the beauty of Heaven. Start acting like it! Start acting like the daughter of the one true King! Adjust your crown, hold your head up, and share His glory in love, tenderness, and faithfulness. This world and your hardships and failures do NOT determine your worth. Your worth comes from above, and it's time to let the world notice that. 

"The Son of God became a man to ENABLE men to become SONS of GOD."

(C.S. Lewis)

Gentlemen, stand tall. Who created you? God. (Can I make the joke about men being the rough draft? Okay okay, fine.) You have a crown too, you know. It has also been bought and paid for by your King. Now, adjust your crown and your attitude as well. Stop moping over your rich and successful dreams, stop obsessing over your perfect six-pack bod, stop thinking you're not good enough because some girl broke your heart. Lean on God and push through the obstacles. You were created to live victoriously. You are a man of God. Start acting like it. Follow God so that you may be the leader. Know God, so that you may know love. You are strong and intelligent.You are valuable and worthy. Be a man of prayer and stand strong in your faith. God took the time to create YOU. There is no other man on this Earth like YOU. Bask in that glory. Thank God. Stand tall. Share your faith, share His glory and His love.

Kaitlynn's world was full of hardships and pain. She persevered with a positive attitude and a mind focused on God. She finished off with a statement: "Just because bad things happen to you does not mean that you have to be a bad person." Just because you are struggling or things are not going right, it does not mean that those obstacles should define you. Your God is for you. It was heart-warming to watch Kaitlynn express that. Ladies and gentlemen, stop focusing on the bad. Shift your focus to things that are above. Focus on the beauty of God and all His beautiful creations and blessings. Now smile. Because YOU were created by Him. Because you are a child of God. Because you are so worthy! Let your heavenly crown radiate with strength, kindness, and prayer.

dear dad

There’s this song that I keep hearing recently on the radio. I’m sure the artist intended for it to be dedicated to some significant other. However, when Charlie Puth ("One Call Away" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BxuY9FET9Y4) sings some of the lyrics, my mind immediately goes to my father. Now, before I begin this, let me just give a quick shout-out to my mother and brother. YOU GUYS ROCK, YOU’RE MY BEST FRIENDS, and I LOVE YOU. But I’m going to shine the spotlight on Dave for a little bit!

It has taken me two relationships to realize that my father is a very big blessing from my heavenly Father. My dad loves me and supports me unconditionally. I have disrespected him and  have been quiet with him, and yet he has still opened his arms when I run back to him. My dad is an amazing reflection of God’s love.  Future husband, if you indeed do exist, you will of course become the man that I love and cherish all the days of my life. But, I’m going to need you to remember that my father will always be the first man that I loved and will always cherish.

When I hear Charlie (I’ve decided he won’t mind that I’ve assumed we can be on a first name basis even though we’ve never met and he has no clue that I exist) sing “I’m only one call away, I’ll be there to save the day. Superman got nothing on me, I’m only one call away,” I immediately think of my father. There’s going to be a guy in my life that will sweep me off my feet, but my loving, greater than Superman dad will always be there to pick me up. It’s okay that I’m 2 hours away, because he is always one call away. He is always ready to be there for me.

“And when you’re weak, I’ll be strong……..and when you feel like hope is gone, just run into my arms.” During this depression and highly stressful stage, my father decided to send me daily texts for a week that read “Kelsey is awesome” or “Kelsey is beautiful” and “Kelsey is smart.” My God blessed me with a father that lifts me up, that reminds me of my glow when I feel a little dull. I can’t help but grin and think of my dad when I hear Charlie sing this song because it’s a song of genuine love, letting that person know that no matter what, I’m going to be right here to catch you and help you through things. That’s my dad. So, without further ado…..

Dear Dad: Let me begin with an apology. I am so very sorry I let boys get in the way of my relationship with my father. I was so busy seeking love and acceptance that I completely forgot about the amazing love and acceptance I already receive from the only man in my life that has been there for me since I came into this world (Blake too, but he gave me a black eye for tickling him so that should speak for itself).  Dad, you set the standard so high for the possibly existing future husband in my life. Thank you for being an amazing father and for showing me what I deserve. Thank you for constantly reminding me of my worth through text messages, hugs, and compliments. Thank you for making me laugh and for the forehead kisses I get when you leave for a business trip. Thank you for being a Godly man. Thank you for being patient when I lose my way and for loving me through everything. And thank you for forgiving me when I accidentally stabbed your face with a stick that had been in the fire. I blame my mother for the pyromaniac-like activity. Thank you for sharing music with me and for giving me your bag of  yogurt pretzels because you know they’re my favorite. Thank you for helping me carry my things when I’m packing to head back to college or running out in the rain with an umbrella when I pull into the driveway in a downpour. Thank you for somehow magically turning my favorite shirt back to the champagne color it’s supposed to be when I accidentally turned it blue. You’re my best friend, too, you know that? You’re the main man I can count on. I love you!

God blessed me with an amazing father. The realization has hit me multiple times this year and the topic lay heavy on my heart Sunday while in church.  Dads are gifts from Heaven. Don’t you forget it, fellow daughters..  Dads are the men that will “be the standard against which you will judge all men.” And my dad sets a pretty high standard. Love your dad. Respect your dad. God has blessed you with a man that teaches you of His glory, teaches you to love, and teaches you that you are so beautiful and worth very much.  “The sacred title of father is shared with the Almighty.”

Thank you, God, for blessing me with such an amazing father. Thank you for blessing me with a father that leads me to You. I love you, Dad.